Today nyco went to SCH for rehearsal. For the first time we played, i suddenly felt the syf mood and spirit. (oh! n smth funny happened after that song. mrs ee flung her conductor's stick at the end of the song. haha! somemore it was towards the xianyue direction. so shocking!) I really like that feeling because i feel that im not walking alone. However, when it came to my mo li hua solo, i didnt play well cos i dont know why i suddenly got nervous. After that, i recalled what yiqing said the day before our nac competition finals last yr,"i dont know why i feel exceptionally nervous for this competition. maybe it's because im going to play a solo in the song. if i didnt play well, the WHOLE group will be affected just becos of ONE person's mistake." And now, i finally get the taste of that feeling. Sometimes, it's not that i completely cant do it, it's like i can play what i want, but when it comes to playing it during dazu, i will not play as well. Nervous? perhaps. I think i really have to train myself to the stage such that i wont be nervous even during syf. Last year, during my nac preliminary round, I wasn't nervous at all. Only when i entered the stage, my heart suddenly beat extremely fast. Indeed, i didnt perform as well as usual. I believe it's because of my nervousness that has caused that. After that lesson, i've promised myself that i wont let my nervousness affect my performance anymore. So, i must do it for syf competition.
Till we meet again..